Margaret Fish

BFA Drawing

ARTIST STATEMENT: Throughout my artistic practice my art has reflected my emotions. For most of my work, it seems the pieces that get the best reviews and comments are the ones fueled by ‘negative’ emotions. Really, they were ones made when I was in a dark place. The working theory here is that ‘negative’ emotions like sadness and rage were easier to convey because I felt them stronger. So, for the first half of the semester I hoped to create the same intensity with happiness. My method of doing so was to listen to a song that just made me feel good, and listen to it a lot, then create. I was starting to really hit a stride and coming close to merging this new style and method of creating with my old one when the pandemic happened. Suddenly I was hit with so many overwhelming emotions and needed an outlet. I suddenly had to grieve what was my sure fire exhibition before continuing my education to become a grade school teacher, to grieve the loss of my wedding date on June 13th after a stint of “will it or won’t it happen”, and question whether my grandmother would be able to see me walk for graduation or if the school would cancel it. Plus, not knowing what would happen to my four essential employee family members. Or what we would eat because stores were worse than I’d ever seen them.

So unfortunately, what happened is a before and after COVID-19 struck a humble Fish’s life. The joy and excitement over two songs and a few memories, before grief I feel unqualified to carry. Grief I struggle to concede to as valid and something I’m allowed to feel in the first place. Because thankfully everyone is well. We’re fed, healthy (ish, it’s a bad allergy season), and we’re currently safe. But this image and its partner “text” have been a space for me to grieve and in a way move on. Because the exhibition is still happening online and possibly in person later, the wedding will still happen at a later date so my whole family can still come, and I will still graduate and walk eventually.